Dude!

Have I neglected my blog or what?  I’m so bad at consistency!  I’m still on track–just summer is so busy and full!  Here’s a quick overview of what I’ve been up to:

weight: hovering around 186-187lbs.

Fitness:  two high-intensity workouts, one boot camp and 2 running sessions a week.  I’ll write more about the HIM class soon!

Night-time snacking:  doing better at keeping it in check–not perfect but an improvement.

New breakfast:  Chocolate oats!  YUM!  To cooked oatmeal, add 1.5 teaspoons of Dutch process cocoa and sweetener of choice to taste. I use splenda right now.

that’s all for now, but I’ve got lots to share!

 

Something New

On June 15th, I will start taking H.I.M. Training class.  I *think* that stands for High Intensity Metabolic Training.  All I know is that it’s gonna kick my butt!  The main reason I’m doing this class instead of the weekly bootcamp is that this class is on site at the Y and child care is provided. 

I’m really going to miss bootcamp, though.

The class runs twice a week (Monday & Wednesday) for 6 weeks.  I have a goal of dropping 10lbs during the course.  I will have my eating en pointe–especially during that 6 weeks. I even made a pot of zero-point soup* and portioned it out for my lunches for the next two weeks.  I’ll do my own workout on Fridays.  Cardio on Tues, Thurs, Sat–in preparation for the 5k.  That’s the plan.

*I didn’t follow this recipe as I don’t generally follow recipes.  But this is a good start.

 

Unprecedented

I ran 30 minutes, non stop today. That equalled just over 2.5miles! 

I can hardly believe it!  Jeez, a 5k is only 3.1 miles–I’ll totally be able to do that.  I think I’m gonna do the one in Woodbury in September and the one in November.

Take that, mutherhumpin’ Poptarts!  Hiiiii-yah!

 

Note to Self

Why the F*ck did you just eat 2 Poptarts.  At 10pm.

Frick Frack

You’ve been attacked by the munchies, but you know better!  So why are you giving in to temptation?  Especially after feeling so confident after bootcamp.  Why sabotage now?  Why?  Is it the fear again–or are you afraid of reaching your goals and getting what you want?  Maybe the compliments you’ve been getting are making you uncomfortable?  Or were you getting complacent and not respecting your addiction to food?

Why are you still using food as your comfort, your crutch? So much is going well in your life, especially your marriage.  What’s going on, Brianne?

Damn. 

My trainer asked me to write a bio for a “member spotlight” for the YMCA and I am SO not feeling it tonight.  Thank goodness tomorrow is a new day.

 

Best Bootcamp thus far

Saturday mornings have been taken over by bootcamp. I haven’t decided if I love it or not.  I do love the feeling I get afterwards:  accomplished, strong and tired!  I’m going to stick with it as long as I can. I really wish I could take the weekday classes but child care + the cost of boot camp is a bit much.

This morning went much better than last week.  Last week, I kept getting dizzy.  Getting dizzy made me frustrated and in turn, pissed off.  Not my best performance by far.  Thank goodness today was good!  I was able to hang in there much better.

So far, bootcamp has only had 2 people participating.  I’m so used to such a small group that a large group would be so different–more people to screw things up! hahaha!  Some things were a bit funny today.  There was a newbie today named Rachel.  Rachel is super sweet but totally girly!  I kept telling her to harness her inner tomboy.  I think it took a bit for her to understand that this is supposed to be a BOOTCAMP experience.  By that, I mean Fred (instructor) doesn’t want us waving to people or getting distracted.  He really does want us to sing loudly in front of all the spectators on the greenway. Once she got that, she was great.  I enjoyed having Rachel there because she’s a cheerful person.  I tend to have a rain cloud over my head when I do poorly, so it was a nice dynamic.

It really took me back today–back to when I cared *so* much about how other people view me.  The old  me would have died before doing a bootcamp. (to be truthful the old me would have never survived a bootcamp, hahahaha)

I’ve still got 27lbs to lose.  I set a goal of a year.  I don’t think that’s going to happen, but I’ll keep on keeping on.  What can I say?  I finally feel like I am never going back to my old ways ever again.  It’s taken me 10 months to truly believe that I’ve changed.  No wonder people fall off the wagon permantly–10 months is a long damned time!

 

Hey Baby!

Sorry I’ve been MIA.  Just super busy.  And not much in the blogging mood. This is going to be a bit random.  Maybe I should bullet point, lol.

-The weather has been so nice that after supper that Husband and I put the kids in the bike trailer and go riding.  I am totally in love with cycling.  Okay, riding a cruiser isn’t cycling, per se, but if I said biking that would mean motorcycle, right?  Either way, it’s just the best.  I love the wind in my hair so, so much.  Husband even bought himself a shiny new bike so we can all ride together!  Now, we are contemplating an upgrade on our trailer.  In my grand scheme, I want to have a pop-up camper and for vacations we’d drive somewhere bike-friendly and camp and just be a family.  I want us to be that fit, active family.

-Exercise is going well.  Food is going well.  I’m feeling pretty zen about it all.  Once I busted 190lbs, things have been better in my mind.  For example, I had bootcamp on Saturday.  Purposely took Sunday off and Monday was Memorial Day and I was just too busy.  Well, Tuesday rolled around and I just didn’t make it to the gym for several reasons.  Did I freak out?  NO!  Because I knew I’d be in there Wednesday morning.  And while I did eat a brownie last night after supper, I know that I can control myself in the evening hours now.  I wouldn’t call it loosening up on myself.  It’s more like a new perspective.  That may be a crappy way to describe it, but it’s the best I’ve got.

-Yesterday, I ended up working out with one of the female trainers at the Y.  Informally.  It was an ego boost because I think I am in equally good shape as a TRAINER.  How crazy is that?  Fred was in the vicinity of our workout and I think he was really proud of me–he said, “Look at you, training the trainer!”  It was really fun working with this woman and I hope timing works out so that we can do it again. I think we could learn stuff from one another.

-I’ve been running on the treadmill again because I’ve committed myself to a 5k in November.  I’m not training for it yet, but trying to warm to the idea.  Right now, I do a 12 minute mile. In fact, I’ve been running a mile as a warm up before my workout.  A 5k is 3.125 miles.  So theoretically, it would take me just over 36 minutes to finish a 5k.  Yesterday, I ran for 15 minutes solid.  So I’ve got to triple that basically.  I’m pretty sure I can do it.  Luckily, I have a friend who is running with me!

 

Note to Self:

WHAT THE HELL?  over 2 weeks without night-time snacking and now 2 nights in a row.  What gives?  That bowl of cereal you ate was ridiculous and it didn’t make you feel any better.

I’m fairly emotional.  I think Aunt Flo is headed my way.  And today, my little boy graduated from pre-k.  I can’t even tolerate the idea of him going to kindergarten in August.  It’s really ripping me up because I feel like the time has just gone too fast.

So enough with the snacking.  Tomorrow is a new day.

And you are wearing your friend’s old jeans–in a size 12, no less–so cheer up!  There was a time when you honestly thought you’d NEVER wear a size 12.  And yet, you are.

 

Bootcamp! Hoo-rah!

Today was bootcamp. It’s being conducted by my trainer, Fred, but isn’t affliated with the Y at all.

I pull up this morning at the greenway, dark clouds over head.  Down in the parking lot, I see Fred all camo’d out with a whistle around his neck.  Holy heck.  I haven’t been that nervous in ages.  I was all twisty in the tummy.  What was it going to be like? Would I be able to hang in there?  What if I royally sucked?

See, what you have to understand is that I am very competitive.  It’s a bit ridiculous, actually.  I hate to lose or suck at anything.

Although nearly 10 people signed up, only 2 of us showed.  I guess they were scared of the rain.  So it was me and another lady, Kim, whom I estimate to be about 45.

Not surprisingly, there was a lot of running.  We even did the cadence singing like you see in the movies.  Lots of Hoo-rahs and O Yeahs.  Actually, the cadence singing was more helpful than I anticipated–it helped keep my mind off the fact that I hate to run and it helped me breathe.  We ran 2 miles today and while it wasn’t continuous, it was still 2 miles. The pace was very moderate–probably it was downright slow.  My guess is 5.2mph.  Slow.  But Kim and I were able to keep going without stopping, which for me right now is far more important than speed.

In between running, we did many different styles of push-ups, jumping jacks, sit-ups and partner exercises.  I had the toughest time at the end when he had us doing scissor kicks and flutter kicks.  Holy moly, was I tired by the 15th count of those.  And since I blew it right at the end, we had to start over. DOH!

Fred has this saying: PRIDE.  Personal Responsibilty In Daily Efforts.  He also talked about focusing on the small details so that the big stuff takes care of itself.  I find this really intriguing.  Because usually the sentiment is ‘don’t sweat the small stuff.’  And this is the opposite.  I’m not quite sure if I agree or not.  Hopefully, I’ll get a chance to ask him more about this, maybe get him to elaborate.

One day later:

OMG!  I am so sore.  My shoulders and back muscles are so sore from all the pushups.  Yikes.  I took today off and I’m taking tomorrow off to have a complete recovery.

 

:) I Can’t Help But Smile

I love, love, love, LOVE my new bike.  It rides like a dream and all my worries, stresses, triggers to overeat just slip away in the wind.  I don’t know firsthand, but it’s got to be better than Prozac. hahaha!  I was a total grump before dinner last night.  After dinner, I hopped on Smurfette (that’s what I named her, hahahaha) and rode for about 2hrs and I was transformed into a happy person

 Seriously, this bike makes me wish we lived on an island or heck, anywhere more bike friendly than my town.  I would be thrilled to live someplace that bikes were a main mode of transportation.  Biking is *so* my thing.  I found my thing!  Yay!  I even told Hubs that I wished we could go on biking vacations–or at least take my bike on vacation!  How crazy is that?  I’m like a kid at Christmas!

Last night, I talked my neighbor into riding with me.  I let her ride Smurfette and it had the same effect on her–she was totally calm after our ride.  Now we just need to talk her husband into letting her buy a bike.

While she and I were riding, I told her that I am NEVER going back to being that fat, lazy, inactive, insecure person.  And I finally believe it.  I’ve kinda had this thought in the back of my mind that I might slip up and end up fat again.  Even after 10 months of becoming healthy, those thoughts were there.  I am never going back.  Ever.  Some of this enlightenment comes from the fact that I’ve busted through my plateau. 

It’s just amazing for me to think about how I used to be.  Right now, I’d rather ride Smurfette than do just about anything.  Who is this person?  I love who I’ve become.  My blog has always been titled “Becoming Brianne” and I think I finally have.

 

Shape Shifter

I went shopping on Thursday.  I needed new clothes in the worst way.  The best part was that I learned I’m a size 12 in jeans.  And not just in one brand either!  The worst part is trying on a hundred pairs to find one if you’re lucky.  But hey, they were 12’s and not 22’s.  It was actually the first shopping trip I’ve had as an adult where I didn’t go into the plus size area.  Man, what a milestone!

 I finally broke down and bought a body shaper.

If I had known how AMAZING it would make me look in my clothes, I would have bought one a long time ago!   It smoothes out all the pizza-dough lumpiness and firms everything up.  And since it’s a camisole, it doesn’t smoosh the booty I’ve done a million lunges to create.  Plus, it gives me this invisible confidence that comes from not having to suck it in all the time, hahahaha!